25 July 2008
still friend *i guess* love someone with no reason? love someone in sudden? haha... u said...y u dint care about the feelings on me? why u been so impatient? "feelings" do really important arent they? i got it! its all over ... i know u hate me ...maybe of being such an annoying person? too stubborn of just care bout my feelings of my own only...and dont really care bout u? why u said that! i even stop contact u for reasons which preventing some disturbing that cause to u! in the mean while... did u really care how i feel actually? after receive ur msg? which is... soo sudden
lastly, i hope that guy can bring u prosperity and take good care of u ...just hope that guy is better than me ... ok ! say no more!
24 July 2008
simply just cant! i love u more than everything... i donno... i wish i can back to our time where we 1st meet each other, where we just know each other!( lame right?) i wish i could.... but no way! but yet! im still awaiting u... simply stare at your photos... i saw love, when u speak, when u smile, when u laugh ...haha (tacky hah?) im not even qualify from the 1st "round" im not even have the chance to fight for what i really want ...already been disqualify! never mind...i will wait! wait for the right time, no matter how long its take...still im there for u!
21 July 2008
since from the day we meet
since from the day u laugh at me
since from the day we played games
since from the day we having a great time together
since from the day u call me darling
since from the day considering me
since from the day u cried on me, lying on my arms
since from the day i confess to u, how i feel deep inside me
since from the day i starts dreaming of u
to be honest! i cant actually get rid of that off my mind! there is something i want to share to... my previous life style was so dull and truely like a walking zoobie simply just online games, pooling, sleep, than some time chill with friends nothing much actually! so lifeless ya? indeed! but, until i be the chosen one to camp as a navy trainee, from there i change alot! i admit! the place let me feel sooo warm .... family warm! serious no joke! i have plenty of sabah's friends thier all like friendly cheering! no matter what kinda troublesome that u face! can actually request a help from, and no doubt ... they straight give a hand without any single thought! how generous? they low in EQ? they dump? they stupid? which helping someone without beneficial thier self... haha rare people right? love them! from there i starting to "survey" on sabah's girl ...and i really got my statistic report haha found out.. that most of them very outgoing girl... and feel supprise that some dusun's girl knows chinese, with their dusun slang ... they are so friendly cheering and do really know how to considering others ...thats really supprise me! imagine... that u were week enough but still someone already falled and still give a hand to her ...that kind of spiritual, braveness, courage, generous...seldom can see in our KL side la.. love them~ =D
jessie liew... im sorry of what i did prviously... maybe just too afraid to lost u ...there is several times i use to just simply staring on my phone and keep wondering "can i make this call?,will u feel disturbing if i make this call?, are u starting ignore me already?, how are u there?,... i do really have tons of questionS to ask but currently cant get the chances yet... still i will waiting for ur returns... memories? i know u have few memories on me... maybe just simply because all the while ...i mean most of the time la.. u with ah tong and as a result ur memories on me is less..*maybe*
u said before that distance is not a matter at all
things do really matter is the feeling upon us
no doubt! im still love with u!
wondering...whats ur answer over there~
items that i bought for u really come with reasons
every items got thier own story, their are not just a "give"
hope someday i can pass it to u with my own hand
20 July 2008
my bro "ah sunn"! between us have no secret no fancy stuff ....he such a MR.NICE GUY ...no doubt wei! brother hood for life! when need help from u straightly just give a hand! where to find wor ?brother like this? *heng tai* sometimes need his ears to express all of my stress and did some counselor part on me ...with those saying part haha... love u la bro~
JASON LOW JIAN SUNN
18
single
mature guy
donno joke
good body shape
long hair
long face
usj 17
engineering course
well! my parents truely are unique! lets start bout my sis... she truely annoying and very disturbing, yeah ...indeed we do quarrel as always haha but u know wert? i actually "gladly" to quarrel with her...in a sences that when someone is caring or considering others... they need some "ways" as to communicate each other ...as my sis she chose to quarrel...BUT sometimes can turns up real ugly ! haha not too bad... sometimes she act nuts! thats really can bring lots of laughters around... NEXT my dad ... a truely traditional chinese man! everything he plan by sequences and he knows everything... indeed some times can be real stubborn! always with the serious looking, he know jokes as well sometime act cute as well just for the laughters... cute ar? hmmm my turns? haha...i'il pass =D owh ya! my step-mom... shes cute in the sences that the way she laugh while eating truely ugly wei!haha btw she is an accountancy got like 30++ people under her line... but! cannot say as superwomen also... cause she not good in cooking... haha... sorry la wei! i love food la... superwoman should everything ma! owh! my maid! she know how to cook reall well seriously.... and as a result end up body size like this la..! and a dog! she is annoying ! always stick me when i getting my shoe
thats all! good ar? theres nor bad or good of dealing personality ... people do really did or done something with reasons just simply different point of view...
"forget the passed, look forward" those motivative lines ...they are easy to say but hard to hard to did it! learn from mistake of how stupidest stuff that i did previously ...im so curious that why u been made plenty of excuses that avoiding me! im sooo afraid that u have hatred on me or simply just hate?... i know theres plenty of better options than me outside there ...im not saying that i wanna stop u or what...
well! actually im quite mad with u and disappointed me again ...as for now! we just remain in friends but my place side have some items that belong to u ...and i donno when is the right time to pass it u
the answer is NO ONE ... well who cares? right? my attitude problem? my bad personality? my bad habbits? my bad looking? u can actually says thousands words of badness bout me... to be honest... instead of getting sick and tired, actually feels numb already. ah ha! theres a line from puah chu kang "do more, more problem, do less less problem, no do, no problem" im not saying that i shall act this way but just simply referring it btw ... sorry bout my english standard maybe cause quite "disturbing" but just simply paham paham la
19 July 2008
annoiying? finger pointing? fasy? bullshitting? nuts? ... those words cant really
describe her! simply just a small piece of matter starts scolding or blaming others, indeed that she bring the whole atmosphere of family when down... such a good sister...where to find? and not to mention... that she's sooo stubborn and goes "nuts" as always... there is an incidence ...i actually miss use her towel which in that moment i was in a rush and i dont really notice that... after she found out ... she dont ask "why" but scolding me on the spot... well i did the apologize part but still her voice pitch getting louder! my apologize like giving her some sort of boost =.=" funny hah? well! thats my sister
i actually cant sleep as for tonight so i wrote this after clubbing haha!... tonight was soooo happening! tonight was outstanding, hot chicks everywhere, popping songs all the while, i only have one word to say "chun!" haha those whiskey over there within 2min can finish 1 bottle! lol... there was like 70 friends over there... every crowd! the dance floor was packed! but sadness is chick on the dance floor every less ...hiah mostly all guys... BUT i manage to dance with girls as well! hehe~
love clubbing
wondering... sweetie got been there b4 ornot... hashas** as for me ... just simply need a way to chill out~
=D
17 July 2008
im so lost ...so so lost! in the sense that i dunno who am i...my dad keep nagging, keep on saying... how useless piece of nothing u are, those words really sounds ugly his anger can comes very sudden without any sign ...well i already get use to it... somehow he dint says wrong either cause i am already is a piece nothing... i donno i really dunno deep inside me ...feels like gasping for air, feels like cant breath "properly" whatever i did something or done something is always wrong! for him ! is forever not enough for him ... and from his vision on me... im actually a failure and once a failure forever failure! well me my self was like a piece of nothing*seriously* my dad like fade out of me... and feel sick to be with me... *feels that actually* i admit that previously i have done plenty of troublesome to him ... i do really feel sorry... real sorry for that ...i dunno... u use to nagging... and i feel sick as well, try to imagine ...the same old thing u can repeat again again and again ... ok ok i know! u do really consider about me and do really care bout me! but the way u care me! was way too much on nagging part ...less action type, and u have a kind of attitude! which is when he/she did something wrong and try to explain ... u will straight up stop people from explaining ...than will always says ur line: the pass is passed, forget it!... i really hate that! somehow maybe this ur way of proving "IM RIGHT!" it is true... u always right, im the one who did everything wrong, everything mess up! dad...u actually dont really care what is the procedure ...what is"really" happening around ...cause u only care bout the conclusion of what he/she end up with? nagging actually change me alot, the way u nag like keep on mention how bad how bad am i ...and how good how good u are ...as a result i end up the part what u are unexpected, which is the *how bad how bad* is this some sort a bad karma thing?...maybe u know have already notice it*i dunno* no offence dad! this is what deep inside me feels like... u know me too well! i know that! it is true !... actually we use speak each other but mostly nagging ... i know! whenever someone is better or greater than me! u nag on me! i know! that actually feel very depressed of...by looking others who better me and think that why my son cant do that?why my son cant end up something like that?why my son cant really did what i have expected? everyone's not perfect dad! so do i... but maybe..im worst
16 July 2008
every part of my life are so screwed *offenly* nothing goes well ... i dunno. maybe some sort of bad karma is surounding me? haha but not too bad as i expected cause after of all that bad incidence over~ god actually reward me something good! something that i have been waiting for loong looong time ago... to find the other half of me *meaning:beloved one* fortunetely i have found the true one's ... which is my girl~ jessie~ well ...theres a saying : god create people with half of human soul and the another half will place in some other people that ur beloved one's ... finding the right one's is not easy in this society ....gladly i have found !!!
AS for me , i do not make any promises but believing, promises for me just a *talk big big* for my point of view la... but believing on others that u really count on him/her, believing on something that u really expecting what will happen, believing on a relationship nor boygirl friends type or just friends type .... all of these, they* are easy to say out but hard to do or done...
im believe u jessie~
is been a long time...we havent meet up till' now and yet u keep telling me ; be patient ... be patient... the time we meet shall come very soon ....hmmm...ok then... i wait! as long as u want! and... please find me! if u get any troublesome ... simply just a call and i will be there for u no matter what! im worry about u cause u live alone there... cant afford to lost u
i dare not to say out whats deep inside me... so i shall use words to express all of it
... As for me myself ...i dunno where i belong to... what am is suppost to end up with? i do really think deep in night b4 sleep or even in day light*day dreaming* i think that all the while... i cant actually find the right answer! cause i dunno what thingy that i really wants... and so do my personality... i always cover up my sorrow by joy and so i act clown act joker... just to hide something deep inside me... i hate that kind of"me" but the reason i did that ... simply because of prentinding that i dont really "need help" and sometimes act stubborn ... how stupid is that...
fortunetely, i do have joy "part of me" i love to tells joke and make laughters every but this was not pretending one's cause is joke "willingly" cause i like to watch ppl laugthing with the wide smile on their faces... when they happy , so do i ... am i a weirdo? i think yes it is!... its really feels so great when i share something good to friends or family , but as for family ...they feel annoiying and ignore me... but *still* i will comes out jokes more just to see thier happy face!~ =D
owh ya! the way i expressed out all the sorrow part ... simply just shout out loud! or sing some song out loud! fuuu... i tell wert! thats actually works... its feel so good~ thats way of releasing my stress... haha~
theres actually more... something...
if manage to remember i shall continue the next "episod"
13 July 2008
there are several of times... im dreaming of u~ imagine that u and me were together that was so honey sweet between us~ u love me~ i love u~ simple as that... no fancy stuff no outsider... just the u and me, when i dream of u ... the time flows so rapidly! simply just cant resist to keep thinking of u... no one can replace u, u are my one and only... well... there are some funny incidence happened around no long ago..
that night i sleep late, real late ..was like 5 am early morning... that whole night keep listening our song (baby i love u) infront of comp while i keep flashing sweetie's photos from NS and her friendster... haha maybe simply just cant sleep...and end up i sleep infront of comp till 1pm i woke up... stupid ya? i know~!
owh ya! another one!...that night same as well... sleep late like 3 la (slightly not too late ^.^) i got a vision of seeing u after i sleep ... it was like i forwardly head to the dream *no joke* if i not mistaken we were walking down the streets from some where... than i drive u to mountain just to see a sun set ... than we actually sleep over nite in the car ... than some one knock the door and says: "weilim ar?? sudah boleh makan la" kanasai! that was actually my maid yelling... and so..i woke up! truely sad la! after that i try to felt asleep again! and try to continue the missing part from the dream ... sadly i cant ... think that was a loud shout getted shocked *i think* hard to felt asleep again! hiah... feel like wacking her!
since u love good food~ and u were soooo lucky that u know me! cause i knew it all of the good food around here ( trust me! just name it!) haha.. i wanna bring u to eat all the good food around here! ... eh! wait! u are in sliming plan hor? aiya! why so coincidence? but nvm... after u done ur sliming stuff... than u shall earn back as well! contra mah~ u lost and earn ^.^
sometimes i imagine
what shall we look like when we were together...
what shall we look like on our 1st date~
what shall we look like when we were in cinema~
what shall we look like our way of dress
what shall we look like.... more more more and more more
i love u jessie~ no matter how far it is! no matter how hard to get it there! i will!!
someday...(but not today and not to mention the petrol rise la..!~!@#$% ) after of all these days do really freak me out cause busy of working.... most of time delivery goods.. and some technician's job damn busy ... weekend time was the only 2 days i chill... this 2 day will be my day of meet u ..sweetie~ theres no one that can replace u ... i love u as always even though we r far away... im so curious that why dint u inform me early on when u went mid valley... i actually stay nearby ^.^ nvm la... theres always a week right?... hope dont happened the same thing~ T.T
love u sweetie~
my sweetie forever~
12 July 2008
CLUBBING session wei ! cool and loud music, hot chicks , whiskey , dance floor ... what else more? this the best place to chill! when u wanna get rid off of ur daily life style or just simply wanna find some place to chill... let me tell u what!... clubbing will be ur very 1st option! well well well... everyone got their 1st time, so am i!
my 1st time actually starts from form 4 la.... but that one dont really counted la..
cause is like ... simply stand there and watch from far... so no count! my actual 1st time is 2th july 1230pm , that day was sooooo happening! i do drunk! so do my friends does... that very night i dance ...alone wei!!! while everyone watching me on the stage! and i dint realise that... untill my friend drag me back to our shade... from there i keep drinking and feel dizzy rapidly~ straight with 8 cups of pure whiskey which is without adding any soda or water...thanks to Chee meng! keep pouring the whiskey than keep saying "yam sing yam sing" and he mention who ever dont dare to drink have no balls no guts wei humiliated our guys pride! kanasai de... that moment really feel like "flying" wei..!! after that when i smoke.... it was like a boost wei! totally cant even stand up straight... truely sick man...but lucky thing is that jian sunn*blood brother* havent drunk yet... so he fecth us all home... such a herowin la... **respect** and so i vomited in my car! but i puke in a plastic beg!
that was such a happening night la... hard to forget! nonono it shall say that ..it will be unforgetable memories ... hahaha
clubbing is truely fun ... some people even dare not to take the 1st step inside...
c'mon... 18 wei! not small liao lo... this the adult life style that we are about to face! and now the time has come ..and think in good way la... clubbing is actually simply just a place to sosial ...make friends well people do need friends ...so go clubbing la! =D
11 July 2008
that day , that night... i refresh back what we have been through in our camp ...remember those obstacles?... that we must climb the wall , tarzan swing... monkey swing and act.... it was piece of cake for me ^.^*actually its really tough la* somehow...
i have complete of all the tests...than theres wati turns , i saw 1 by 1 our wati fallen in water when reach the tarzan swing ... especially my girl... the mud everywhere and the navy uniform was completely wet but still with the joy smile on her face~ i love the way she smile and the way she talk(voices)
well... talk bout when is the 1st time we know each other i guess is the day u starts calling my code number C333 instead of asking whats my name is... that moment i remain my coolness ^.^ and just simply reply : ya? thats what i remembered our *very* 1st talk =D ...ah! and our 1st joke , when u pass me a *chipsmore* cookies...
then when i look at ur face... i thought theres a "chipsmore" above ur lip... that was simply my mistake... cause that's a mud... not chipsmore from that day onwards..
whenever u pass me chipsmore cookie i will be telling the same joke... lols maybe just simply too bored in the camp wei... =D
from there.. onwards.. u use to smile... and laugh out loud! when i joke... i love that... i dunno when is happened but it comes so sudden that i found out i have felt in love with u
time passes day by day... i will be there waiting for u
10 July 2008
theres a line...chinese ver.*
"Money is not everything , but if u dont have money u are nothing"
it is true actually... c'mon look at this society ... they fight for money
they need money to survive ... everything has their own value of money
then?... what is the cost of *love*? how much is ur prosperity?
obviously there are "product" that written *not for sale*
if theres money ... theres everything... and dont be supprise
that ur the so call "the other half" broke up with just simply because
of ur money is not enough use for her...
get it real bro... it is a wise choice that u broke up with her
NOW people! pls beware the world outside that u about to face it!
people out there is like a whole big "food chain" they earn their money
by *anything necessary * real cruel... theres my advise..
think twice ..nonono think thrice before end up something worst
as for the overall ...the life style in the camp... was quite satisfying...
the time flows like water... after of those days of hard work...team work...
friendship... laughter... and more importantly ... my girl * jessie*
i have learned more than enough bout friends
friends do really means alot to me ...
they give a hand when u in trouble
they advise u when u were about to do something wrong
they cheer up for u when u needed some support
they are like light tower when u in dark
people says... couples just simply *more* than friend
i totally agreed with that...
when he and jessie was doing all those tacky stuff and with joy
its make me feels happy for them actually...course they do really "get in to each other"
besides... they really felt deeply in love to each other ....
unfortunately... after the camp ends.... i heard that she broke up with him ...
right before i departure from the airport
i get to know that info... that day she cried... with the forehead lying down on my chess
i was shocked! why such a senario will happened? that moment my heart was so broken..
she was so moody ...but just for" while" than she rub it off her tears.. and "stay down"
that really surprise me ... just to cover up hide her emotion expression ...
that is one of our common... strong jessie...
09 July 2008
theres a girl... who really unique for me and she was such a beauty~
nor just the sweet looking~ but her caring personality...
she was talented in study and thats make her an 11A's student...
well ... i felt in love with her not because of those reasons....
the story shall starts with the day 9 in the NS camp in Sabah
days b4 day 9 was so busy inside camp... with those belongings..and blah blah blah
i do meet some sabah's friends and they are quite cheering and friendly "hot" within 8 days..
day 9 our guys side only starts "aggressively" to know some chicks** well... simply because of
game of "true or dare" who ever loses shall did what the majority request to do...
and... that day was truely not my day... i keep losing and did lots of stupid stuff...
stuff like shout out loud *I LOVE U* infront of the officer ... some how ...i did that!!!!!
one of their request is "floating" an innocent girl... so.. they chose jessie.. which have a very obvious mud infront of her lip... and that very particular day... i crap* alot simply just
keep her talking from there ... we know alot stuff within each other in common...
day by day... we did have lots of laughter and more and more of chips more ...she love that..
from there... i still dint realize i have already fell in love with her... untill she couple with ten *which is one of my sabah's friend* then only i notice i need her to be part of me! only i realize how she means alot to me.... that incidence was quite a while... and i remain a happy face
thats what i always did...which is joke around... make some laughter ...
i do really regret that moment... i dint aggressive enough to confess to her !!
somehow i revoke my plan not to be a 3rd party of them...
course i dont wanna have a hard time for both of us...
from there onwards... i act like clown ...fooling around just to pretend that i dont really care...
trust me... it is harder than its look like... try to imagine..
when they are so sweet to each other at the mean while u act like joker.. clown?..
well.. most of ppl think that"why not just ignore them"?
"if" i ignore them this means im acting weird... and thats make them curious ..
i dun wanna end up something ugly ...
